The Shot Clock & The Drunk Scale

Because I enjoy the occasional beverage I decided for future blogs it is important to distinguish the criteria for the “Shot Clock” and the “Drunk Scale”.

Let’s begin with the shot clock, here is how it works:

Each “shot” is either:
(1) 12 oz. beer
(1) 1 oz. shot of straight booze (Whiskey, Tequila, Vodka)
(1) 2 oz. shooter (you know Jagerbombs, White Russians)
(1) 4 oz. glass of wine
(1) 8 oz. mixed drink (Jungle Juice, Jack & Coke, Red Bull & Vodka)

The shot clock works in a 24 hour period, just like a real clock. This way I can easily track how much I drank by using the using the criteria. For example, on a typical haggard weekend. I would start at 4PM and end at 1AM, 7 hours on average 15 on the Shot Clock. Which happens to land me about a 6 or clearly drunk on the Drunk Scale, which we explain more now.

The Drunk Scale:

Level:	Effect:
1	No Effect
2	The 2 beer buzz
3	Clearly buzzed
4	Probably should not drive
5	You’re feeling real good
6	Clearly drunk
7	You might puke
8	Everyone hates you
9	Slurring words, trouble walking
10	Drooling , piss-pants drunk
>10	You need to go to the hospital

Now let's apply the Shot Clock to the Drunk Scales:

Level:	Effect:	Most Girls:	Most Guys:	Me & My Friends:
1	No Effect	1	1	1
2	The 2 beer buzz	1	2	3
3	Clearly buzzed	2	4	5
4	Probably should not drive	3	4	8
5	You’re feeling real good	3	5	10
6	Clearly drunk	4	6	12
7	You might puke	5	9	20
8	Everyone hates you	6	12	25
9	Slurring words, trouble walking	7	15	35
10	Drooling , piss-pants drunk	8	20	35-40
>10	You need to go to the hospital	10+	20+	40+

The great part about using these scales, I can easily track my progress and grade my drunkenness. Be sure to refer to these tables when reading future blogs.